Ward Vs Cherry Vs Avatar

It's not that I disagree with Cherry's view that Avatar is a great film, in fact I agree with him on that point, what I disagree with - and I hope I don't offend him - is what he preaches are the parts that make this a great film.

There are three clearly defined / succinct acts that make up Avatar, and act three is not the best, not by a long shot. Sorry Cherry. Acts One and Two are so ground-breaking it really doesn't matter what happens in Act Three.

To start: Avatar is predictable and ham-fisted. That we can all agree on. It follows the tired Hollywood action film formula to a tee, especially as we reach the uber-predictable ending (third act - or as I like to call it 'the bit where they all have a big fight, good people die but we all know who's going to win in the pissing end, come on!'), but there is a twist!...the bad guys are you and me. Which is why this film is saved from being just style over substance. The use of modern military lingo (see Generation Kill) and images reminiscent of recent world events (9/11 & The Iraq War) gives the story some grounding in our own reality, it is believable, even down to the blood thirsty war addicted Colonel, people like him exist, just switch on your mother fucking television sets.

Sure the acting is adequate (Sam Worthington and Stephen Lang being the only stand out performances), the cardboard dialogue is questionable (titanic-level?) and that last act; although predictable is visually impressive, but none of these negative points are enough to take away the glory from Cameron's smoothly mitted palms.

No, the reason that Avatar has set the new bench mark for all future mainstream blockbusters is that visually we have seen nothing like this. Not only has Cameron pushed the bar on CGI / live action integration but he has poured such passion into creating this fictional world of Pandora, his passion / jizz can be seen on screen, all $400m of it.

He has gathered / surrounded himself with hundreds of artists and scientists, and his 'titanic' 12 year absence has paid off, he has been slowly working away in his ego bubble all this time, to deliver to our eyes some of the most beautiful images ever burnt to celluloid. To prove my point please click on this link and bathe in Cameron's mind, wonder around in his imagination, skinny dip in his love juices....The Science of Avatar: http://www.aintitcool.com/node/43440

I'm not going to bore you with all the detail, I'm not even going to wax lyrical / fapp all over this for you, no, instead I'm going to provide you my highlights. Sit back, grab your sen a tissue, enjoy.

Benny's Bestest Bits:

- The opening few minutes...startling / mesmerizing. Cameron first reveals Pandora via the giant mirrors of a highly detailed spacecraft, he teases us (like Miss Harrison in those afternoon Science lessons), we start to salivate. We realise we are in for the ride of our sodding lives.

- Michelle Rodriguezeses breasts in IMAX 3D! Approximately 2hrs 11mins into the film she swaps her kaki garb for a figure-hugging white top....imagine the screen filled with her milky pillows when the screen is the size of an 8-storey building!

- Night time on Pandora. Cameron has (quite obviously) been influenced by Studio Ghibli (Laputa / Spirited Away / Princess Mononoke) as well as Terrance Malicks The New World. Which is only a good thing, because when night time arrives on Pandora everything bathes in this beautiful bio-luminescence, its visual cream for our feeble human eyes, you may even find yourself involuntarily dribbling down your own drooping chin.

- Colonel Miles Quaritch (played by Stephen Lang). He isnt very original, but he is played with such intensity that you can't help but admire him and despise him in equal parts.

- The CGI / Live Action integration. Remember when you saw Gollum for the first time in 2002 (The Two Towers), you wet yourself because he was perfectly realised by WETA, the most realistic CGI yet....well times that by a thousand, because Cameron and WETA have used that technology and not just created one character but a whole world, detailed to such a degree that no human mind can fully take in what is being presented before it, rumour is that only 3% of humans can actually see Avatar 100%. Amazing.

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I'd like to thank Steven Cherry for watching the movie and reviewing it, shame he watched it through Robocop eyes and fapped over the final 'action times infinity' act, but I'm glad we can agree that Avatar is one hell of a cinema experience. Love you.

In closing I'm going to steal from my inferiors...'Go watch it. In 3D. At an Imax.'